Pain

Metaphors

My life isn’t a metaphor:
I can’t tell you I’ve reached
Open windows led by
Closed doors, Or…
How I write in the dark;
In the absence of light
My heart tends to spark, Or…
How love is the pill
That heals the pain it
Causes;
I’m betting for its gains
But I’m inspired by its
Losses, Or…
How every gambling Lover
Still owes me the debt—
The cost of every poem written
Due to their promises unkept, Or…
How poetry is my life-line–
Hard to tell if my words
Follow its rhythm,
Or if I’m lost in its rhyme.

-ChristinaDelCarmen

Heartbreak Queen

Heartbreak Queen:
Let down your guard
Before you take off your dress,
Don’t you know making love
Is better than having sex.

Heartbreak Queen:
Stop pushing away the good guys,
Not every word they say
Is constructed out of lies.

Heartbreak Queen:
Don’t be so hard,
I know your heart is still fragile
Your soul is decorated with scars.

Heartbreak Queen:
Learn to let go of past pain,
Not every man you meet
Should be put to blame.

Heartbreak Queen:
Stop hiding behind bottles and cigarettes,
They won’t ever numb the pain
But will leave you full of regret.

Heartbreak Queen:
Learn self love first,
Only when you value yourself
Will a man appreciate your worth.

-ChristinaDelCarmen

Pain Is Easy

I can’t help it…
I have a pain in my heart,
The more I try to dissect it
It breaks me apart.
I’m constantly lying to myself:
One day I’ll fall in love through a kiss
But I had a negative reaction to the spell.
I try to fix my broken heart
In these poems-
But all they do is emphasize that
I’ve always been in love…alone.
Shakespeare said, “What’s in a name?
That which we call a rose by any other
Name would smell as sweet.”
Well…love is pain and it’s all the same bitter scent to me.
Would Romeo and Juliet
Stand a chance if they could’ve been together?
Would their story make such an impact
If the clock was set to forever?
I wasn’t always this way
I used to believe in magic-
But love experienced me to say
That it is nothing else but tragic.
I used to anticipate first kisses
That’ll lead me to becoming a Mrs.
But when I gave my heart-
It was returned drained and in pieces.
Why do I fall in love with
These blood-sucking leeches?
I tried being a “good woman,”
Be loyal to a man
Accept his flaws, make him beautiful
Be as understanding as I can.
But what did love do for me?
Infect me with ills. My prescription
Is to swallow this fucking bitter pill. So
I rather deal with the pain.To know nothing is
Meant to last. That people fall out of
Love and their future becomes a past.
Pain is easy, I’ve learn to sabotage
Any potential. If I feel caterpillars about
To transform to butterflies, I fuck up and
Make it look accidental. Pain is easy,
I’m in a long-lasting relationship with sadness.
It has made me realistic and forget love
And all its madness.

-ChristinaDelCarmen

Love Limbo #3

The Heart and Mind conspire
When they create a so-called love.

They make you believe in magic
With tricks of butterflies and fairy dust.

They leave out what happens after forever
When Love finally claims you as a victim.

The true love story was imaginary
How quickly reality became fiction.

Nothing so pure can last
Eventually its perfection becomes tainted.

What good is a Heart and Mind that after love
Leave you without desire or will?

They keep you alive enough and sane enough
To endure the pain you were meant to feel.

-ChristinaDelCarmen